13 Childhood Rules That Make No Sense In Adulthood

Life as a child is often governed by a set of rules that seem essential at the time but can become baffling in adulthood. These rules were meant to instill discipline, cultivate manners, and sometimes just make life a bit easier for our caregivers. However, some of these childhood mandates don’t hold up under the scrutiny of adult life. It’s time to reassess these rules and see which ones you might still be following without realizing their irrelevance. Here’s a look at 13 childhood rules that simply make no sense once you’re all grown up.

1. Be Seen and Not Heard

Children are often instructed to keep quiet, giving preference to adult conversations and decisions. This rule can inadvertently teach kids that their thoughts and opinions are not valuable. As an adult, embracing your voice and expressing your thoughts is crucial to personal and professional relationships. Good communication skills are essential in navigating the complexities of adult life. It’s important to speak up and be heard to form meaningful connections and advocate for yourself.

In work environments, being vocal can lead to new opportunities and foster innovation. Suppressing your thoughts and ideas can stifle creativity and growth, both personally and professionally. The ability to articulate your ideas and concerns is a critical skill that should be nurtured rather than suppressed. Speaking up can lead to more satisfying relationships and a more successful career. After all, your voice is a powerful tool.

2. Don’t Be a Tattletale

Being labeled a tattletale as a child was often discouraged to instill camaraderie among peers. However, as adults, reporting wrongdoings or unethical behavior is often necessary and responsible. Whistleblowing can be an essential step in maintaining ethical standards in workplaces and communities. Understanding when to speak up and the impact of doing so is an important aspect of adult life. The ability to discern between gossip and necessary reporting is vital for fostering integrity and accountability.

Reporting unethical behavior requires courage and a strong sense of ethics. It’s about ensuring that environments remain honest and trustworthy. Speaking up can prevent further wrongdoings and promote a culture of transparency and fairness. It’s crucial to assess situations carefully and understand the potential consequences of staying silent. Adults have the responsibility to contribute to creating safe and ethical spaces for everyone.

3. Don’t Talk to Strangers

As children, we were all warned about the dangers of talking to strangers. While this rule is crucial for child safety, it becomes less practical as you grow older. In adulthood, interacting with strangers is a part of everyday life, from networking events to social gatherings. Author and social scientist Brené Brown highlights the importance of connection in human experiences, which often begins with engaging with strangers. Learning to assess situations and people on a case-by-case basis becomes more relevant than the blanket rule of not talking to strangers.

Building a network often starts with a simple conversation with someone you don’t know. Whether it’s for personal growth or career advancement, the ability to engage with new people can open doors. Being cautious is still wise, but so is developing the ability to read situations and trust your instincts. As an adult, you often have the knowledge and experience to discern between a safe interaction and a risky one. The key is to balance caution with open-mindedness.

4. Don’t Play with Your Food

Parents often discourage playing with food to maintain order and cleanliness at the dinner table. This rule is practical for children who may not yet understand that mealtime is not playtime. In adulthood, however, the act of playing with food can translate into culinary creativity. Experimenting with recipes and presentation can enhance your cooking skills and enjoyment of meals. It can also encourage more mindful eating and appreciation for the food you prepare and consume.

The culinary world celebrates creativity, and sometimes a little play is necessary to innovate. Whether you’re arranging a fruit platter or trying a new plating technique, creativity in the kitchen can make cooking more enjoyable. This playful approach can also be a stress reliever, turning meal prep into a form of self-expression. Adults have the freedom to enjoy and appreciate food in all its forms, including its aesthetic aspects. Embracing this freedom can transform cooking from a chore into a delightful experience.

5. Don’t Touch Anything

Children are often told not to touch things to prevent them from breaking valuable items or making messes. While this rule makes sense for small hands prone to accidents, it’s less applicable in adulthood. Touching allows you to engage with the world and gather information through tactile feedback. As psychologist David Eagleman explains, touch is a crucial sense that helps us connect with our surroundings and improve learning. Adults can make informed choices about when and how to handle objects, reducing the risk of damage or harm.

In adulthood, the ability to touch and interact with objects is often necessary and encouraged. Whether it’s trying out a new gadget at a tech store or feeling the texture of clothing, touch plays an important role in decision-making. This rule of not touching can limit your experiences and understanding of the world around you. It’s important to use your judgment and engage with your environment thoughtfully. Allowing yourself to touch and explore can lead to richer, more informed experiences.

6. Say “Sorry” Automatically

You might have been taught to apologize quickly and often as a child, even when you didn’t fully understand why. This rule was meant to teach manners and promote harmony, but it can have unintended consequences as you grow older. Automatically apologizing, especially when you’re not at fault, can diminish your confidence and convey a lack of leadership. In adulthood, it’s more important to understand when an apology is appropriate and to offer it genuinely. This approach fosters more authentic and respectful relationships.

Apologizing should be a meaningful act, not a reflex. It’s important to own your actions and acknowledge mistakes, but over-apologizing can undermine your authority. In professional settings, excessive apologizing might make you appear less confident or competent. It’s better to reserve apologies for moments when they are truly warranted and necessary. Understanding this balance can lead to more genuine interactions and a stronger sense of self.

7. Don’t Interrupt

Interrupting was likely discouraged in childhood as a way to teach patience and respect during conversations. While it’s generally polite to wait your turn, this rule can be too rigid in real-world scenarios. Sometimes, interjecting is necessary to clarify a point or contribute to a fast-moving discussion. According to communication expert Celeste Headlee, effective conversations often involve interjections that keep the dialogue dynamic and engaging. The key is to know when it’s appropriate to interrupt and how to do so respectfully.

In meetings or group discussions, there might be moments when interrupting is essential for clarification or contribution. Knowing when and how to interrupt can lead to more productive and engaging conversations. It’s about reading the room and understanding the flow of dialogue to ensure your contributions enhance the discussion. Politeness remains important, but so does making sure your voice is heard when it matters. Balancing respect with assertiveness can lead to better communication outcomes.

8. Don’t Ask Too Many Questions

As a child, asking an overflow of questions might have been met with impatience or irritation. This rule was likely meant to maintain peace or focus, but it can inadvertently stifle curiosity. In adulthood, asking questions is a powerful tool for learning and growth. Curiosity is often rewarded in professional and personal settings, as it can lead to deeper understanding and innovation. Embracing your inquisitive side can open doors to opportunities and foster lifelong learning.

Adults who ask questions demonstrate engagement and a desire to understand and improve. In a work setting, this can lead to better performance and more collaborative teamwork. Being inquisitive encourages a growth mindset, enabling you to adapt and evolve in various aspects of life. Don’t let childhood constraints limit your curiosity; it’s a valuable trait that should be nurtured. Asking questions is a skill that can enhance both personal growth and professional success.

9. Always Follow the Rules

Rules are essential for maintaining order, especially for children who need boundaries and structure. However, as you transition into adulthood, the ability to question and challenge rules becomes increasingly important. Blindly following rules can limit creativity and innovation, both personally and professionally. In many cases, rules are meant to be guidelines rather than strict commandments. Understanding when to follow the rules and when to challenge them is a crucial skill for navigating adult life.

It’s important to evaluate which rules are necessary and which ones may be outdated or restrictive. This doesn’t mean disregarding authority or structure, but rather understanding the purpose behind the rules. By questioning and innovating, you may find better solutions and more efficient ways to achieve your goals. Adulthood comes with the responsibility to discern when to adhere and when to push boundaries. This mindset fosters growth and progress in various areas of life.

10. Don’t Brag

Children are often taught not to brag to avoid arrogance and maintain humility. While modesty is a virtue, adults often need to advocate for themselves and their achievements. In the professional world, self-promotion is necessary to advance your career and gain recognition for your accomplishments. Knowing how to highlight your strengths without crossing the line into arrogance is a critical skill. It’s about striking the right balance between confidence and humility.

Self-promotion involves communicating your value to others in a way that is authentic and relevant. This can be achieved through sharing your successes, skills, and experiences in a manner that resonates with others. It’s an important aspect of personal branding and professional development. Don’t shy away from acknowledging your achievements; it’s okay to let others know what you bring to the table. Mastering the art of self-promotion can lead to new opportunities and career growth.

11. Sit Still

Children are often told to sit still as a means of instilling discipline and focus. While sitting still can be important in certain contexts, as an adult, constant motionlessness can be counterproductive. Movement is crucial for both physical and mental health, impacting everything from productivity to emotional well-being. Adults should prioritize incorporating movement into their daily routines, whether through exercise, stretching, or simply taking breaks from prolonged sitting. It’s vital to recognize the importance of physical activity in maintaining a healthy lifestyle.

Incorporating movement into your day can enhance focus, creativity, and overall well-being. It’s not about abandoning discipline but about finding a balance that supports your health and productivity. Whether you’re taking a short walk, doing a quick stretch, or engaging in a full workout, the key is to stay active. Movement boosts energy levels and can improve mood, making it a valuable addition to any routine. As an adult, you have the power to decide how to keep your body and mind in motion.

12. Always Finish Your Plate

As a kid, you were likely told to clean your plate at every meal, regardless of hunger. The intention was to prevent food waste and ensure you were well-fed. However, as an adult, you have the autonomy to decide how much you want to eat. Nutritionists today, like those from Harvard Health Publishing, emphasize mindful eating and listening to your body’s hunger cues over obligatory plate-clearing. This childhood rule can lead to overeating and an unhealthy relationship with food if not reconsidered.

In adulthood, you have the responsibility to manage your portion sizes and dietary needs based on your health and lifestyle. The rigid rule of always finishing your meal can promote unhealthy habits, such as ignoring feelings of fullness. This can contribute to a cycle of overeating, which may lead to weight gain and associated health issues. It’s healthier and more sustainable to eat until satisfied, not stuffed. Grown-ups get to make the call on how much is enough

13. Don’t Be Bossy

Being called bossy as a child often carried negative connotations, discouraging leadership qualities. In adulthood, the ability to lead and make decisions is invaluable in both personal and professional settings. Leadership skills are essential for managing teams, projects, and personal responsibilities. Being assertive and confident in your decisions can lead to more effective leadership. It’s important to differentiate between being bossy and being a strong leader.

Leadership involves guiding, motivating, and inspiring others, as well as making tough decisions when necessary. Embracing leadership roles can lead to personal growth and expanded opportunities. It’s about being decisive and clear in your vision while remaining open to feedback and collaboration. Strong leaders are able to balance assertiveness with empathy and understanding. Don’t shy away from stepping up; effective leadership is a skill that can benefit all areas of your life.